But what other people don't seem to realize is that it also hurts for the person who rejected you.
Pretty weird, huh?
I guess not everybody is the same but for me, I have a hard time turning people down since I'm a pretty nice person. i just don't wanna hurt anybody but I gotta go for one of the lesser pains.
Would you rather be friend-zoned or ex-zoned?
Why would you wanna start something you know has no valuable end?
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| Oreimo |
SCENE # 1:
You have had a crush on this person but they rejected you. How would you react?
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| Fate/Stay Night: Unlimited Blade Works |
Here are some do's and don'ts.
DO:
- Feel free to be sad. it is pretty sad after all. Cry your eyes out until you have no more tears left to cry and no more f**** to give about that crush. Just let it out so you can let it go early.
- Ask for confirmation. I mean, it'll be better once you're reassured that there really was nothing you could do but DO NOT BE TOO PUSHY.
- Let it go once you've had closure.
It's gotta be tough but things don't last forever. Hang in there, buddy.
DON'T:
- Get aggressive. I've known others to be way too persistent. It ends badly, take it from me.
- Guilt trip the person. It's already terrible enough that they had to reject you so don't make them feel more like a jerk for doing so. Leave peacefully with good memories and dignity.
SCENE # 2:
You were an item/couple/or in some special relationship but it ended.
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| Nyan Koi |
Dang sunnn, whacha gonna do now?
You can follow the DO steps from the previous scenario and as for the don'ts....
DON'T:
- Be bitter. Everything happened for a reason. You both deserve better. Your love is for somebody else.
- Try to force the relationship back together. You should just let it go because trying to temporarily fix something will end up hurting you longer.
Okay, so story time~!!!
So, during my first year of college there was a guy who apparently seemed to like me. Like it was super obvious and other people knew it too. I hate being teased about stuff like this so I always hinted that it was a big fat no and he somehow got the memo.
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| Tamako Market |
But for one class, we were forced to hang out and get to know each other better and I really liked his company even though I hated his guts beforehand.
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| My Little Monster |
After we had accomplished our task for that class we had another one which needed to be a sorry letter for someone.
He gave his letter to me and it was basically saying sorry because we couldn't be together anymore. He could easily fall in love with someone he likes, and that he likes me but didn't want to get hurt. It was goodbye.
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| Angel Beats |
I was devastated. I felt depressed for days but I decided to get him back so i tried to talk to him but I knew he was right. I couldn't return his feelings so in the end, he would be the one to get hurt. I was so depressed I asked to go the the rest room during my favorite class and everybody, even my teacher, knew something was up. Of course, they teased the guy and I left the room with my heart feeling as heavy as a rock. Upon arriving in the rest room I faced the mirror and convinced myself that everything was going to be okay. Like, why was I even affected by his loss? I had been left by several more important people, so why should I care about him? And then, he was there. He passed by the girls' rest room to go to the guys' one and he asked if I was okay. I was really surprised because I knew he was just checking on me. I told him I was fine and tried to make my way back to class but he followed me and tried taking back what he said in the letter but I brushed him off.
Later that night, I just couldn't resist it. I sent him a long message which implied that I liked him and couldn't be without him (BRUH YOU DID WHAAT!??). Yeah, I wasn't really sure of it at the time but I supposed I did like him since others convinced me that I was feeling this way because I liked him and I thought about it too. And I also thought, I'd learn to love him more along the way. (MAN THIS STORY IS LONG UGH)
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| Love Live! |
So yeah, he came back into my life and we developed into an unofficial relationship. I didn't want to say i loved him because it would be a commitment but I eventually did. We did a lot of things together and he always made me really happy but then there were times where he didn't. He was a really jealous guy and I felt like I was losing my tiny bit of freedom. I thought about it for a while but I decided to keep on trying to make things work and as I told him I loved him I told it to myself as well.
So the school year ended and a few weeks into vacation, I decided to call it off. I no longer wanted him to wait and get his hopes up. After all we had been through, i knew I couldn't see it to the end. I knew that the reason I had kept it going on for so long was because i was scared of the consequences and the things I had to answer him. It was hard because he refused to let go. He was certain I was just going to go back but I wanted out. He did some things that really creeped me out but the whole thing was extremely painful. His questions, the tears... I didn't want them. I couldn't stand it.
It was just too painful.
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| Free! |
He wouldn't give up unless I said it in person but I never got the chance to since I had to go to the province so I gave up and decided to continue our little affair.
We called each other everyday and everything seemed normal. Except I didn't say I love you or send any hearts. I needed him to understand that I didn't love him. One question he asked me was if I ever loved him at all? I replied with no. Of course I would say no. if I said yes he would just try to rekindle it but the thing was, I didn't love him anymore and that wouldn't change. At one point, i thought it would be best if he just hated me.
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| Ouran High School Host Club |
Finally, after a few more weeks I ended it for good. No more calls. I just wanted to be civil. Only talk if needed. We still chat a bit though. And we follow each other on Twitter. I'm still affected though. I hate it when I know there are people who like him (But why though? He aint even handsome or friendly so I'm rlly confused) and I react to his tweets in a way that might be a little mean but that's how we interacted at times before. Our interactions are beginning to fade away gradually but sometimes I'm tempted to message him but I don't.
Even if I miss him or it hurts, this is for the best. I shouldn't use him as a temporary substitute because I'm feeling lonely.
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| So much substitution in this manga it's like math lel Kuzu no Honkai |
Nobody deserves to be a substitute.
Yeah, I've been terrible at the love game because maybe, love isn't a game. It isn't something that has to be won. It's something given and received. It's a gift. You don't have to try so hard to love because love comes naturally.
If it's not meant to be, then it's not meant to be. Never settle for second best. find someone who truly loves you the way you love them. It can be hard to be lonely sometimes but it's even harder to live with a broken heart. Don't play with others' feelings and don't let yourself be played with.
Love isn't a one sided thing. If anything happens, good or bad, it's because of the both of you.
Don't let the pain get in the way of a better future. Use it as a stepping stone to jump over to a better place. Learn from your experiences and be grateful for the things you have or once had. You are who you are because of everything that has happened to you.
Don't be afraid to love~!!! There are some great people out there~!!! <3 <3 <3
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| Non Non Biyori |
